rocket_scientist

Genius alert... Ruby on Frost BBC4 now

Close to the pitch is good. It allowed us to have a larf with Mo Jonhson (Celtic) with all sorts of banter involving wanker hand gestures and it allowed me to give Gazza a feartie when I made on I was throwing it back in his face, but I held on to it. The junkies who gave McCann (Hertz) a reapeated dose of "yer mithers a mattress" was priceless, the first ever utterance of such a phrase.

The dyke on Question Time is quite sensible and articulate. Was it wrong to make reference to her sexuality?

Never knew who that was but Shazam did the business and right enuf, never heard of them. Interestingly good and upbeat. Was put off by the fact that they're popular, particularly by Americans. Bit sceptical that crazy game of poker seems to be their smash hit, the suggestion being that some of their other stuff may be shit. Thanks for the intro.

EPL did have the best teams in Europe not too long ago but the balance of power has shifted. Italy had the best 30 years ago. La Liga is where it's at now. Awesome display by Bilbao. Stunning football. Man Ure were shown up as horribly pedestrian. Giggs immediately before getting subbed showed his true tink character. Rooney wanted off, bubbling like a bairn until he got the message that it was as obvious to his management team as the rest of us that there was fuck all wrong with him. Scored a cracker after that though. United are dire. Just a shockingly poor football team. On principle, if they do win the EPL 2011/12, it's a fucking disgrace. But City are a shit unit too. What a shit league, over-hyped to fuck. Let's get Keys and Gray back. That'll help the cause. Fanny league and fanny broadcasters.

Bilbao v. Man Ure on 5 now.

You might have got me this time but as the Who sang "Don't get..." and George Bush famously said, "make a monkey of me once, the second time will be with goats milk".

You really are the paragon of awesome, as your avatar proves. El I vee, ee are pee, double O el Liverpool FC

Not really enough to stop reading though, is it? Why didn't you like them?

"So imagine if Jesus..." What was so offensive about the first four words?

No flies on you, eh? Allow me to re-phrase. Why, in your opinion, were the first four words so poorly constructed that you were unable to continue?

You have yet to explain what the weakness was in the first four words? Despite being asked to explain yourself by at least two of us, you avoid the tough question. This wouldn't be another symptom would it?

You've already advertised your inability to understand what day of the week it is. Celebrating the non-reading of a post said it all. Nobody uses big words. The fact that you understand fuck all doesn't make me pretentitious.

If a post is not understood, then there are two possible reasons. It was either poorly constructed by the writer or the subject matter was outwith the ken of the reader . In this particular case, I suspect it might be a bit of both. Kafka though? He was depressing as fuck and nae cunt turns into beetles in my shit.

The fact that a story of a fish eating a cow turns into mercy fucks and the administering of oral sex upon a dog is a level of depravity not usual for the United Kingdom. Syria possibly, but not Great Britain. I think I need a Campari and Soda to calm down. Or maybe a Cinzano or Pimms.

You should try Heavy Horses by Jethro Tull. Don't buy it. Just try it. That will save you wasting any further time let alone money.

Hey ty - can I call you ty? - you can stop now. I can't read your tattoo from here but as I said, content irrespectumus. The first four words, you said. Your decision was based on the first four words. What was the context or vocabulary that spat yer goat or sooked yer craw?

I don't talk. I act. Knowing about that particular process is as culpable as participating in it. The bukkakee is a sorry specimen. A bukkakor is equally sad. I just ejaculate on people in a light hearted, fun manner. Not that the random people on the bus or train always appreciate this.

Why did it start poorly?

I would drown you in it young boy.

Well if is is, I'll be the daddy.

If it makes you happy, I think they played good football last night, although I missed at least half of it. If it's the truth you want, swallow this. The 1,000 scouse fans at the Emirates the only time I've been contained an unhealthy proportion of tinks and scum. This is not an opinion. This is fact based on how they behaved to fellow human beings who happened to support Arsenal, to fellow human beings who had the audacity to work for the authority known as the police, and towards the horses upon which these evil authority figures sat.

Not celeryness. I may hate it based on fear of liking it.

People who say "I didn't get past the fourth word" or the second paragraph or whatever might as well have a tattoo on their foreheads. The content of the tattoo is pretty irrelevant actually, as it is a reasonable assumption that having a permanent mark voluntarily positioned there defines one's stupidity. The broadcasting of ignorance is done in very different and often subtle ways. There's nothing subtle about advertising one's incapacity to concentrate or celebrating one's own ignorance and for any human to call another a black bastard is similarly crass. I live in a North East town of sizeable enough population and it is full of the most racist disgusting pigs you could ever imagine. Their "excuse" is that they don't see and mix with "darkies" but their parochial insularity hardly justifies their own stupidity. The pack mentality, all hating "darkies" and "hamilton accies" together makes it all right in their stupid fucked heads. In this regard, the outlawing of racist outpourings is one of the few occasions where I applaud the nanny state. Political correctness enforcement measures more often than not makes my blood boil but these fuckwits need educating. This makes me stupidist, no doubt but racism in any form is born from the same fear and scepticism of venturing outside their own hugely limited maps of reference. The haters hate themselves and in this regard, this makes me happy.

And Glasgow would be better without three quarters of the population speaking oot their arses. Conservative estimate.