Superstar Tradesman

Good.

My brainbox might be going a little these days and although I don't have a Scooby Doo where the Gordon Hotel is, I'm certain that Wellington Road is up at Altens or Tullos isn't it? If so, you'd have to jump in a taxi at Pittodrie, travel along King St back into town, take a right at the very bottom of Union Street, go halfway up one of the longest streets in Aberdeen, cross the bridge at the Trinity Centre, take a left down Bridge St, circumnavigate the train station, down South College St where the 'ASC KILL AWAY FANS' (or words to that effect) graffiti was for years, pass under the rail tracks at the arches, cross the river Dee bridge, up past Cragies and then drive up the hill for another couple miles. Then having went through about 50 sets of traffic lights, 20 roundabouts, 5 dual carriageways and 30 junctions, you'll finally be at the hotel for a dust up. That's not exactly "fighting at the football", causing 'normal' fans any problems or bringing a bad name to the club is it? Unless of course you live 10 miles away from the ground right next to the hotel of course and you happened to be washing your car at the time. Did anyone actually hear about this kerbside shoe shuffle before it was in the papers? Sounds to me if the taxi driver had been caught speeding and was in possesion of a AFC tax disc then he'd be staring at a lengthy spell in the nick.

Don't quote me on that. Literally.

Unless they draw. Betting's for mugs. Where's my fiver?

I have a good feeling about this one. "Never bet on red"

I was actually expecting a.n.other to post exactly that. If you get your finger out, I'll take you off the list of two.

El Padre beat me to it. Didn't think I'd been to that many until I started counting. Although the 'new' teams to the league weren't playing in the SPL when I was going to games. Been to Celtic, Utd, Hibs, Kilmarnock, Rangers, Livi, Partick, Inverness (when they played at Pittodrie) Hearts and Well are the only two 'established' teams I've not been to although I've been lifted by the Motherwell cops on route to a game there so I've sort of had the away game experience there. Then there's the newbies Falkirk, Hamilton, Inverness and St Mirren which I doubt I'll bother with.

I'd really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, reeeeeeally would like it if I could have a 'blank poster' function for my Xmas. Thereafter I promise to be a good boy in the New Year and not turn every thread into a slagging match where I pick on the simple kid. Lots of love, J.T.

Oh look, another thread where the customers are always never right. Doesn't matter how many facts you throw at him, even in the face of being humiliated he can't admit he's wrong. Very childish indeed. ? ? ? - the Comedy Ali of Donstalk. <insert_youtube_clip...there_are_no_US_forces_in_Iraq>

Shortly featuring in the drinks aisle at a Tescos near you.

Back on topic: It's an unrealistic expectation that you'll ever say anything of any merit to say.

Seen as those two stirred conversation and the longest thread on this site was started by yours truly then yes, it would be much better than say the Roosterbooster thread that's been done to death, a thousand times, over the last 3 years. Unlike this beezer of yours: http://www.thedandies.co.uk/messageboard/index.php?topic=5966.0 But yet again you're adding nothing to yet another thread. Tell me, do you sit waiting for me to post with your hand on your clit and one eye on the wavey smilie? It certainly appears to be the case.

I'd imagine it goes a lot like this: "Hello, it's Jimmy Calderwood from AFC, we're interested in a couple of your players". "Oh really, which ones would that be?" "Emm, any that are coming to the end of their contracts." "Well we've got Davie and Robo we're looking to cash in on, they've only 6 months left". "Ehhhh, we're looking for players who are out of contract and are free to talk to". "You can get Davie and Robo for sweeties, nominal fee, poke o' chips". "Forget those two, anyone else?" "Well we've got Wee Craigie who isn't getting a game, but he's a funny guy and Thomo who I've never seen play because he's always injured". "Sounds good, we'll take 'em! Anyone else?" "Aye, there's Goggsy but you wouldn't want him, he's shite, in fact he was playing keepie-uppie at a family barbeque recently, miscontrolled the ball and then sparked out his Dad's old dear". "Kicked his Granny?" "I know, shocking isn't it?" "Bingo!" "What?" "Tell all three I'll be in touch!"

It's what he does best. After pouring liquids into a cup.

Really? Hmmmm.

Deano!

Nevermind, you'll always have..... You'll always be..... You're..... Nevermind.

Wife and kids finally left then have they?

As TF says, those that aren't prone to knee-jerk reactions realised that although we'd had a poor start, we were only about 5 points off 2nd place. I do wish we'd sort out our starts to the season though. Pre-season training seems to do nothing for us.

Clutching at straws back in September is what got your into this financial crisis.

I'm not too fussed about a replacement 'keeper. Bossu's never going to get near the first team and if Clangers gets injured then we get special disponsation to sign someone else in an emergency don't we?

I also seem to recall placing a little wager with Reekie that JC would still be here at Xmas. Candy from a baby.

Serotonin levels at an all time low this afternoon!

Goal celebrations should only consist of punching the air with your fist whilst screaming "COME ON!!!", jumping the advertisement boards whilst beating your chest or sliding towards the stand on your knees before the rest of the team join you in a massive pilie-up. Sadly kissing the badge is a shallow attempt to win over the fans before you disappear to the highest bidder a week later. Any form of dancing is gay, robotic or rehearsed 'moves' mean you're not spending enough time practicing football on the training ground and lining up to rock invisible babies make you look like you're playing for a netball team. As for kissing your ring finger and pointing at your wife in the stand, it's an embarrassment and should automatically be a straight red. Triple back somersaults, backflips and handsprings are cool as fuck and as if it's not enough that you've just hit the back of the onion bag, you've also just temporarily defeating gravity, and yes, you are the coolest cunt in the ground. My imagination says it's nothing remotely funny or interesting.

Ad infinitum. It's a bit disconcerting that we're on a roll of 4 home wins and playing well. It's bound to go tits up on 27th when I'm back in town.