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Saturday 23rd November 2024 - kick-off 3pm

Scottish Premiership - St Mirren v Aberdeen

Stuff wot i found on teh internetz


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Posted

Are we talking bukkake?

I don't talk. I act.

 

Knowing about that particular process is as culpable as participating in it.

 

The bukkakee is a sorry specimen. A bukkakor is equally sad.

 

I just ejaculate on people in a light hearted, fun manner. Not that the random people on the bus or train always appreciate this.

 

Posted

That sort of behaviour will get you on the register again.

 

Is there any way of getting further up the register like it is a ladder league?

 

I rape your wife and I go above you. You suck off my dog and you go above me.

 

might make it more competitive.

 

 

Posted

Rape my wife and you become the undisputed world heavyweight champion.

 

It's not rape with your wife though. It's a mercy fuck. You can't get on the register for mercy fucks.

Posted

The fact that a story of a fish eating a cow turns into mercy fucks and the administering of oral sex upon a dog is a level of depravity not usual for the United Kingdom. Syria possibly, but not Great Britain.

 

I think I need a Campari and Soda to calm down. Or maybe a Cinzano or Pimms.

Posted

The fact that a story of a fish eating a cow turns into mercy fucks and the administering of oral sex upon a dog is a level of depravity not usual for the United Kingdom. Syria possibly, but not Great Britain.

 

I think I need a Campari and Soda to calm down. Or maybe a Cinzano or Pimms.

 

Truly hideous beverage, the embodiment of evil. I can tell you a story about how I came to learn this if you make some toast.

Posted

The pope LOOKS like a child molester. Not that there is necessarily a template.

 

A man's life and thoughts are written in his face. Whereas I am the picture of health, wisdom and serenity, that weirdo looks sick. If me and the pope walked into a boozer, the chicks would all flock to me and the dogs would whimper under the table at the sight of the false white-robed cretin.

 

Not that dogs should be allowed in pubs. They stink. Cunts who go for a walk with the dog and come in for a swift one should fuck off. It's your ugly stinking hound. You deal with it and don't subject the rest of us with having to endure it's stupid face.

 

Then there's patrons who think dogs are cute and give it all this attention. They only think it's half cute really but by showering affection on it, not only do they feed the thick dog's insatiable need, they satiate their own. It's like they're proving to the rest of the pub that they are capable of giving love when the reality is that their stupid lickle lives are notable by a complete absence of love, both giving and receiving.

 

20+ degrees today, it's supposed to be. Absolutely magic. Golf this afternoon. The world is great.

 

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