The Golf Thread

[rocket_scientist]

5 minutes ago, hercule poirot said:

You're boring me now. 

On a completely different subject, I'm away down to Dundee today to buy a car. 

You can't be much of a detective. Nobody goes to a dealership to buy a new car. They did, 20 years ago when there was no choice. I got my new car last month and my wife's new car gets picked up on 1st September but the internet is a wonderful thing, determines the price that the dealership needs to give it to us for and saves lots of money.

As the wolf says, get out of the sticks gentlemen. Play new vehicle brokers off one another, not dealerships.

You're welcome. 

[hercule poirot]

I appreciate your words of advice, thank you. 

But.. I'm old skool, I prefer to see, touch, drive and then make my mind up. 

As you know, car salesmanship is not a vocation, it's a last resort job for those who have fallen by the wayside. I'd prefer to decide while standing looking at the product rather than rely on some uneducated anonymous oik to get things correct. 

Thanks again though. 

 

[rocket_scientist]

So, unable to make up your mind, not knowing which cars are excellent, you will waste four figures just so you can touch and smell the product in advance?

25 years ago, every new car (retail, not fleet) was ordered through a dealership. In recent years, the proportion ordered through brokers instead has been increasing steadily. Ok, it's still well over 50% of you who don't but nobody is disputing that the majority of people are stupid. But wake the fuck up. See and drive it if you must but don't negotiate with them. 

[rocket_scientist]

But of course, it's probably a used car you're going for. 

[rocket_scientist]

And please, with sugar on top, don't dare to come back on here to boast that you got a "cracking deal". Only the very stupid do this, for reasons known.

People are pussy and for those of us without mortgages, the car is the biggest expense we have. When spending big, or mostly on finance, they're terrified that they paid too much and will swallow the sales patter readily and self-deceivingly.

[rocket_scientist]

The motor trade is full of conmen and thieves. They only profit from the stupidity of the public. Even on finance, they profit from the buyer not even having basic arithmetic, nor the intellectual capacity to understand what they're signing up for. Fools and their money. It was ever thus. 

[rocket_scientist]

Calum Hill a great Scottish prospect. Flying under the radar, he will be well known real soon.

[rocket_scientist]

1 hour ago, hercule poirot said:

As you know, car salesmanship is not a vocation, it's a last resort job for those who have fallen by the wayside.

A show of disgusting snobbery. The man who handed over my new luxury estate was a lovely guy, and successful too by the look of his watch, shoes and clothes. My last five have been estates. Being 5' 3", it's important for me to get a big car and to present myself as a big man. Functionality isn't as important and form. A big car also says that I have a bigger cock. I've saved over five figures twice on my last two however as Mercedes are over-rated. The C Estate is tiny and the E Estate, whilst boosting my cock size was a bore to drive.

[rocket_scientist]

Remember when power steering and electric windows were new features? After you had it, you couldn't go back to a car that didn't have it. In the last 10 years, adaptive cruise control is a feature I couldn't live without, probably rear cameras too but the Pilot Assist function, which I didn't know I had for the first year I had my last car (same model as this one), I can live without. It's just a bit freaky for the car to be driving itself around every bend in the road, even on motorways. Fuck that shit. I very rarely use it. Will probably always stick with automatics now, much as my favourite car is manual and worth less than a grand. The luxury of taking a 10 year old Nissan Micra into toon and not giving a fuck in the car parks if anyone bashes their doors into it is wonderful.

[royal deeside cowie]

Put the fishing rod away, shorty. Its too early for haddock and chips. I sense you are going to be reunited with ghosts from your past very soon in the form of Millertime and Piddler. The natives are restless, brother. 

[rocket_scientist]

On 14/08/2020 at 13:53, rocket_scientist said:

From Scotland, Bob MacIntyre and Connor Syme the next to kick on, very different golfers but great talents.

Connor 7 under today with 3 to go. Pieters just eagled 11 to go back into the lead. Get in there

[rocket_scientist]

Wilco Nienaber, 20 year old South African. Wait until you see this guy hit a Driver. He's just gone 3 under for his first 4 today at Celtic Manor but I have never seen anyone hit it so far in over half a century of watching golf. Last year at the Lytham Trophy I saw him hit Driver, 7 iron into the 7th. Those of you who know that hole on the greatest golf course in the world will appreciate how preposterous that is. And there was NO WIND! They were raving about him at the Brabazon two years ago at Frilford Heath but I never saw him that week. You will all have heard of him before he gets to 22 years of age *

* apart from the mutants who aren't interested in golf but who must be heard and pretend to be expert in fields that they're not

[royal deeside cowie]

You`re a 25 handicapper, brother. Katie Price could speak with more authority on golf than you. 

Edited August 16, 2020 by royal deeside cowie

[royal deeside cowie]

Just stuck a pony on Meronk. If this comes in theres a pint in the tank at Drummonds waiting for you when lockdown eases next week. 

[rocket_scientist]

4 minutes ago, royal deeside cowie said:

Just stuck a pony on Meronk. If this comes in theres a pint in the tank at Drummonds waiting for you when lockdown eases next week. 

He's another of my clients, from way back in his US college days: -

 

 

[rocket_scientist]

I don't see anything in his performance data to suggest he's ready to win his first event today though.

[rocket_scientist]

20/1 is a good return though and probably about right.

I'm desperate for Connor to win. It's going to be tough playing with Horsfield (who putted poorly yesterday but is an awesomely consistent ball-striker) and I'm looking for Cormac to have a great round, to continue his excellent scoring trend this week. Cormac one of the best iron players in the world and is putting better and better as the weeks go on. 

[rocket_scientist]

Fuck, bogey at 1 by Connor (toughest hole on the course), only his second drop of the week and a treble by Cormac at the 4th.

Bad start to the day but ho hum, see it all if you keep looking long enough.

Edited August 16, 2020 by rocket_scientist

[rocket_scientist]

2 hours ago, royal deeside cowie said:

Just stuck a pony on Meronk. 

That's amazing that both of your picks in the last week never got close to giving you a run for your money. What a shame.

There's 40/1 here waiting for you here if you fancy another bite or you want to go chasing?

[rocket_scientist]

Go on then since it's you, 125/1 (but minimum stake a tenner).

[Donofanewera]

5 hours ago, rocket_scientist said:

I don't see anything in his performance data to suggest he's ready to win his first event today though.

He should quit if you don’t think he can win.

 

 

 

 

 

 

twat

[rocket_scientist]

7 minutes ago, Donofanewera said:

He should quit if you don’t think he can win.

 

 

 

 

 

 

twat

You should quit if you can't see two and a half dozen golfers beating your pick.

If he quits golf, it takes money out of my pocket. I said I didn't think he wasn't ready to win TODAY.

Your obsession on this forum has been noted by everyone so try and grow up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fucking infantile thick cunt

[Donofanewera]

Why are you so angry,

 

small man syndrome 

[Donofanewera]

What a dickhead

[rocket_scientist]

In the US Am final, it went all the way to the last with a best ball of 23 under. It's amazing to do that anywhere but to do it at Bandon Dunes is a staggering quality of golf. Their conveyor belt seems to be as strong as ever and whilst Hovland and Horsfield are European by nationality, they learned how to play in the US.